Game of the Year Awards 2005 (by Suislide)

[Stifmeister]

Hell yeah its the only fucking game of the year awards that count! Not user selected because users and morons and not selected by abunch of cunts who get paid for it! No! Its purely me and my completley always correct opinion on what should be the game of the year. If you disagree with any of these clearly you have no taste. So here i shall present thee with the VGS Game of the Year Awards 2005.


Game of the Year 2005:

F.E.A.R.

Monolith finally decides to finish a game and hell yeah it kicked so much ass that im giving it game of the year. Sure it ran like a wagon with dog shit rammed into the wheels but HEY! It looked pretty damn good in the process. Not to mention the action (though repetitive) kicked tons of ass. Go into slow mo kick a guy in the face then turn around and spray some bullets into some fuckers head. All with tons of blood, sparks, and dust all being propelled into the air and putting large holes in the walls. Not to mention the ending with the explosion was just plain fucking incredible! The AI was also great and actually wasn't a pile of stupid shit! They actually tried flanking around you from different directions! They actually jump through railings instead of having to go around! Holy Shit! So due to this game not sucking the fat dick like many FPS this game gets the Game of the Year award. Quake 4 was the closest thing in my mind but fell short in certiain aspects. Also Civ 4 would have been here but then i wouldnt have anything to put in the strategy category as Age of Empires 3 definatley doesnt deserve that title.

Action Game of the Year:

Dungeon Siege 2:

First of all lets face it that this game is not really an RPG. Its more like a hack and slash game with some nice RPG elements to make it more immersive. And hell yeah did it kick ass. Its basically like Diablo II in 3d. Theres tons of different weapons and tons of different enemies and not to mention hundreds you get to bash to shit with a sword. Also there are many varations in the locations you are going through and you get to leave a pile of dead ass and titties as you go through it. Not to mention the new skill tree they put made the game have something more to it over the first game. Hell Dungeon Siege 1 almost completley played itself which was homosexual. However this game comes backs and kicks ass.

Adventure Game of the Year:

Indigo Prophecy

Well technically this game won by default since it was really the only adventure game to come out this year. The ones released by the adventure company are just major piles of shit that are going to be constantly churned out until HOPEFULLY that fucking awful company goes bankrupt. Anyways this game brought some innovation as it was like watching a movie, and the story started off well. Also it felt quite immersive until it started getting fucking stupid. The end of the game was a pure pile of shit and the story got so lame as if they were desperatley grasping with for ideas with all the different clans. It was retarded. Anyways it was enjoyable for awhile and actually only wins by default. So Indigo Prophecy gets Adventure Game of the Year.

FPS of the Year:

Quake 4

Hell yeah we all know Quake 4 kicks pure ass. It was about damn time we had an old school shooter with kick ass graphics. The graphics of course started off shit but later in the game they actually started caring and it looked fucking amazing. The action kicked the most ass in FPS for awhile. There were all the standard quake 2 weapons and it continues the story line which is badass. There is tons of things to shoot and some kick ass scripted sequences like when your ship blows through the building. The AI isnt anything special but who gives a shit when you are mowing down 5 guys with the hyperblaster then turn and fucking blow someone away with the rocket launcher. This game had fun as hell action so Quake 4 gets FPS of the Year.

Racing Game of the Year:

Who Gives A Fuck?

Nothing wins in this category as racing game suck like a gay man on cocaine. They all blow and never have anything fun about them. Take need for speed most underground wanted 56. Its the same pile of shit that keeps be released over and over and you piles of shit buy it. WHY? The game is fucking hunk of shit. All the levels look exactly the same and not to mention its the same as the last god damn game that released just before it. Also they get abunch of shitty ass rap music to fill your ears with because of course thats what is cool. ITs cool because they said so! Sports game also suck a fat dick. Who the hell ever wants to play a sports game? Go outside you lazy cunt. Therefore since nothing was even fun about it i give it to Flatout since technically it just came out in the US and its the only racing game in awhile that hasnt sucked balls.

RPG of the Year:

Guild Wars

This game was one of the few RPGs that actually came out this and kicked ass. There was others such as Knights of the Old Republic 2 which sucks a big huge dick and sucks dick compared the original. This game is sort of like a MMO but not completley. There is main cities which can lead to missions in other places and moves you along with the story and shit to the next area. There is also smaller missions which are garbage and somewaht pointless besides to level up. SO then each main city is like a 3d chatroom to get people to join your homosexual ass in the next mission. Its fun beating the piss out of monsters with an actual large scale quest to complete. The downside is alot of times groups you will make fucking blow and leave you dead 50 times because they suck so much ass. Then you can also join/create and guilds and do pvp battles against each other for rank. This game kicks some good ass and is way better than any other RPG that came out this year especially Kotor2, obsidian you fucking suck. So Guild Wars is the RPG of year.

Strategy Game of the Year:

Civilization 4

So Civilization 4 gets the strategy game of the year. Who knows why i didn't play it but my friend did and said it kicks ass so thats good enough for me. Anything has to better than Age of Empires 3 which is the same fucking thing as the last three Age games except with awesomely narrow field of view. It seemed to be graphics were most important when making that game. So civilization 4 has to be pretty who knows because i didnt play it. If anyone has any real info on ill put it here instead of fucking around!

Multiplayer Game of the Year:

Battlefield 2

Hell yeah if you arent a faggot and love kicking ass then you would like Battlefield 2. This game has large sacle action with various classes such as assault, support, medic etc and tons of vehicles of which you can get and kill people. HELL YEAH missles fucking flying everywhere and people dying left in right. Bust in a camp with a helicopter full of people then kill all those arabs that are and laugh as you capture the flag. This game kicks so much ass its ridiculous. There is tons of multiplayer ass kicking. Though you may want to get the addon because EA is fucking garbage and made it terrible if you dont have the addon. If you dont have it other people get the new crap from the addon and can use it against you while you cant use it at all which is fucking garbage. I heard that idea was terry schaivos last dying wish. Someone should have put cholophorm in feeding tube. Anyways this game is the best mutliplayer ass kicking experience you can find. Teamplayer with classes and vehicle for large assaults on camps and team work. This game fucking rocks and gets the Multiplayer game of the year.

Shit-stained Game of the Year:

GUN

This game is the worst fucking pile of shit ever. Not only is hyped up with tons of commericials and garbage ass previews the game is self is a sack of shit. If you watch the shit commercials you may notice it flashes the game in quick scenes as to hardly show any actual gameplay shots. Reason being? It looks like a fucking pile of shit. Someone decided to get abunch of shitty artists together and make pure garabge for everyone to stare at then try to hide their mutated retard creation of a game in the commercial. Not to mention the gameplay is SHIT, easy, simplistic, extremely boring, the AI fucking sucks. Hell they must have taken some lessons from John Romero on how to make AI. I could headbutt my fucking monitor and then headbutt my dog and make a better game this pile of shit. Its so incredibly awful and if anyone likes it they are clearly a pice of shit low life and it may just be legal to beat the piss out of them. This is worst game that came out this year.

Copyright ©2006 Suislide.

[Nitro]

another awesome review by the almighty Suislide!

[Stifmeister]

Yeah he's the best for sure.

[Stifmeister]

LOL those images aren't working anymore.. Oh well, too lazy to edit.

[Duke Nukem]

Game of the Year 2005 : F.E.A.R.
nice game, but too much stupid players online

[Stifmeister]

Game of the Year 2005 : F.E.A.R.
nice game, but too much stupid players online

Stupid players or too n00b for your skills?

[Rafal]

LOL teemu.. @ Nice topic tho'.

[Paradox]

WTF? Fear?